It was one of those days…

 In A thought

Alligator

Ever have one of those days? One of those days that starts off like any other day but then it takes a serious left turn? Take today for example. I’m just hanging out minding my business. Staring at the ocean when I happen upon a runnin’ buddy and he’s got these really nice boots.

I’m thinkin’ those are some nice boots only I don’t say that. I say, “how in the hell does a no count meretricious drifter get boots like that? Steal ‘em?” I only called him no count because I know him and his people and let’s just say between us that he tends to have a lot of really nice stuff that he keeps in other people’s houses until they ain’t there to have it no more. I said meretricious cus of this word a day calendar I’d been working on in my spare time.  

“Nah,” he says. “I’m on the up and up. I paid for these boots and I got a deal on ‘em.” Now unless he’d won the lottery and I ain’t heard then he must of gotten one hell of a deal. I wanted to say something clever to state my opinion, but I was only on January third in the calendar and I didn’t have that many words to use. So I just went with something he and I would both understand.

“Bullshit,” I say. “You’ve never had something you didn’t get with a brick, crowbar or just unlocked door.”

“I paid for them. Paid a big damn price. I cut out the middle man and got these boots my own damn self.” He starts waiving his arms and pointing down to the boots. Only, I realize he’s just got one hand. Last time I saw him I definitely remember two.

“Just where’d you get them boots?” I’m looking at the place his hand wasn’t anymore.

“Right at the source.” He smiles and walks on away.

Now, I got to thinking about that missing hand of his and about them boots and how nice they were.

Anyway, here I am starring at a pretty pair of boots and the boots are staring back at a pretty nice lunch. And I find myself asking “Ever have one of those days?”

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Comments
  • Matty Sullivan
    Reply

    Insert shaky footage of a wrestling match between a yowling redneck and a thrashing alligator. Both of them are drunk.

    Blood. Lots of blood.

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