Do What You Can with What You Have.
As I take a long deep sigh of both relief and despair, I can’t help but laugh at the pure insanity that you can experience when creating something meaningful. I guess as Steve would say, “Here’s to the Crazy Ones”. I’ve learned many lessons over the past few weeks, but the one that has become my dearest friend is the very one I plan to expound on today.
When I first embarked on this journey I had this fixed idea of what I wanted and how I wanted it to go, but oh how the mighty have fallen. Here I lie slain and humbled by the creative process without a single regret. Regardless of how many grey hairs that are yet to come, I am quite proud of my relentlessness.
There was a time, nothing short of two days ago, that I had no clue of what I was doing, or where I was going. Thus I didn’t know where I wanted to transport my audience. The only thing I knew, and I still know now is that I must create something meaningful. I must create a film I genuinely love and can be proud of.
For a short while, I was crippled by the thought of not having enough money, or resources to get the job done. Then, when I realized I was essentially panicking before I even had a finished story that I wanted to tell I just laughed at myself and carried on. This crippling sensation of needing things before I even knew why I needed them caused me to pour my focus in places they didn’t belong. Where there is a will there is a way. Whether it’s gear, location, or whatever you have made your chosen poison – it’s still possible. Look deeper into the problem and solve it.
Then there came the Time Dragon. Beware of this dragon. He likes to creep in and tell you filthy lies. Lies that will bring you under this weird spell of thing that you don’t have enough time. Trust me, you can make the time. There is always time. You just have to create it.
Today, while recovering from a cold that seems to love me dearly, I sat at my desk and attempted to work on the stories that have been burning in me, and some that were fresh. A week ago, I felt like I couldn’t write a decent sentence to save my life. A month ago I questioned whether I was cut out for this profession, but today everything came together. I was on fire. I say that in the humblest way possible. Remember I have been slain by just the writing process alone, but I wanted to tell you that at some point we all want to give up.This moment of clarity that I am experiencing may turn to an entire panic attack the night before our first day of shooting, but I wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world. After drafting and redrafting and finding the light at the end of the darkest tunnel in Gotham, I have finally found what I was looking for. I have stories that abandoned because I was making it more complicated than it actually was. Then there was a time when I settled for the sake of doing something.
While our goals and paths may differ, or be one of the same, I want you to know that you can do it. Just simplify the problem and tackle it. Get to the root of whatever the issue may be, or the story you want to tell, and find a way. For me, it was the act of doing the work, and the work itself. For you, it may just be convincing that local cafe clerk that his location and only his location is the right one for the story you want to tell. Get it done.
Imagine if you will being on your death bed – and standing around your bed – the ghosts of the ideas, the dreams, the abilities, the talents given to you by life.
And that you for whatever reason, you never acted on those ideas, you never pursued that dream, you never used those talents, we never saw your leadership, you never used your voice, you never wrote that book.
And there they are standing around your bed looking at you with large angry eyes saying ‘we came to you, and only you could have given us life! Now we must die with you forever.’
The question is – if you die today, what ideas, what dreams, what abilities, what talents, what gifts, would die with you?